After-thoughts – Day 19

After-thoughts
Begin
Cloudy
Dismal
Endangering
Fruition
Graciously
Hoisting
Ideas
Juggling
Kaleidoscopes
Lavishing
Moments
Noiselessly
Over
Points
Quibbling
Restlessly
Silently
Tumbling
Under
Verdicts
Wavering
Xeroxing
Yen’s
Zenith

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Papa in an Urn – Day 18

He left her wondering
Which part of herself
Was held most
Closely to his heart

The Robin Egg Blue Urn
Embossed with Golden Curlicues
was an After-Thought
Cradled in her palm
She pressed her nails into her flesh
A Pressure rose
As she disfigured her Heart with Sorrow

Her eyes bore the weight of much Living
Tears broke like icicles from the rooftop
Crashing down
Indistinguishable in the Mayhem
of Her Suffering

She retreated to the Morbid Thoughts
Hardened with the Brimstone and the Ash
Protected from the Life
the Brilliance of the Light

She put him on the shelf by Mama
feeling like she should
Run her palms up and down
A fresh cut Rose
Just so she might
live again

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A Long Green Snake – Day 17 – a different perspective

I’m a long green snake I lay upon this forest floor
I lie in wait for something forbidden and something more
I hear the high pitched wails of the Distant Drummer’s Lament
I see the cold outlines painted hard in their intent
I’m a long green snake upon this forest floor
I wait
The sodden earth my comfort my home
Soon to lay in it as bare once lively bones

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I Imagine – Day 16 – an extraordinarily mundane List Poem

I imagine
My head as Earth

I imagine
My thoughts as Tectonic Plates

I imagine
My actions as Eruptions

I imagine
My reactions as Lava Flow

I imagine
My life as Explosion

I imagine
My death Quiet and Slow

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My Mother is Dead Anniversary -NaPoWriMo Dramatic Verse

My mother is dead
It has been 5
Long today years
My face draws back a look
I hold the pain and anguish
Like a chalice
Frozen in time – as if
Sweet and Sublime
But it is bleak
And I am empty
There is not much
Left to me
My feelings have become
These 4 Dark Walls
that are my
My home
At times, I become her, I am her
As I rationalize and rage my way through misunderstandings –
is that what they are?
Her forever-nascent self
Promises of new behaviors and new ways
of looking at things –
When she looked at me
She didn’t see me
She saw herself
I was her mirror
And I have been told, that if you
stare into a mirror, you will see the devil.

She was as bold as a lion
As vulnerable as a newborn babe
Left to rot in the field
While the sun quickly slips down winking

I feel the pressure of her love
Her eyes like dark panes of glass
Searching for a light
Hard and cold on the surface
She shatters she cuts I bleed

I could scoop her up now and
make a new day wish
like she was a dandelion
Or cover myself with her soft grey ashes
Wafting like a breeze through misty patches
of memory –

A smile. A scary look.
The bulbous veins running down her hands
that never touched me without wincing.

Her heart was large and palpitated with
a sort of artistic frenzy –
A few people saw her.
I did.

I love you, Mama, I love you.

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Day 29 – In a Restaurant Window

I sat at dinner
across from my precious spouse

Dinner Ate Me

I looked outside at the window
at the large green shrubs pressing
their green-ness
into sunlight
into pain

And I thought of all the people inside
Bursting inside
their gut

While lingering outside
in my intra-space 
are the green bulbous succulents
mucous membraned orbs

Stare softly 
then claw

Quickly I take a bite
and compliment the waiter

As if he didn't mind
the Sweet Charmer
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Day 25 – Let Me Go

do not love me
just let me go
my lies will 
cover you
as new fallen snow

cold and crisp
stiffly settled in
my heart pounds twice
the race within


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